New and nifty gift ideas from the Q-riosity shop at Quass.com
Ye Olde Owle Shoppe
of Great Gray Owl Dorian Gray


unique owl-related gifts and more from Quass.com
Welcome

to Ye Olde Owle Shoppe. I'm your host, Great Gray Owl Dorian Gray, with a wide and growing selection of unique gift ideas (owl-related and otherwise) from the fine folks at Quass.com (read "author Brian Quass of Alexandria, Virginia, USA," all right?). To navigate the store, simply 1) scroll up and down, 2) click the up-and-down arrows, or 3) locate specific gifts directly using the dropdown menus located under those (ahem!) perhaps somewhat handsome little photographs of yours truly, shall we say? (ahem! ahem!)
Oh, and while you're shopping, check out the ever-changing collection of goofy photographs that we're adding to the store, thereby giving you lot a reason to visit even when you're flat broke -- which we hope is not the case today, by the way, because make no mistake, folks: your purchases here at Ye Olde Owle Shoppe are what spark, spawn and otherwise sow the seriocomic seeds of the wit and wisdom of one Brian Quass, the whatchamacallit webmaster and author of this here Quass.com site, don't ya know?

Bookmark this page and check back often, folks, because this is no fly-by-night outfit I'm running here, notwithstanding my admittedly nocturnal preferences when it comes to finding dindin.

Dorian Gray
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Houston, we have a sale!

Mayan Pin-up Calendar Calendar Print

Keep track of the coming Mayan-predicted "end of days" with this attractive pin-up calendar


Available as Calendar Print,

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Jellyfish Float On Calendar Print

Jellyfish have gotten a bad rap. Just look at those graceful bodies! They're living flowers of the sea -- albeit they have a few thorns. Help rehabilitate their reputation with this Float On calendar


Available as Calendar Print, Framed Panel Print,

Click to read gift-related article
Frosty the Snowman here, saying I buy all my corn cob pipes and button noses at the Q-riosity Shop gift shop at Quass.com (yep, that's this very page, folks!)

Barred Owl Who Cooks for you Chef's Apron Apron

Celebrate the famous mantra of the Barred Owl with this illustrated chef's apron


Available as Apron, Bib, Bumper Sticker, Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Magnet 10-pack, Mousepad, Mousepad, Mousepad,

Click to read gift-related article




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When will that wonderful gift arrive?!!

Make Love Not Jihad Bumper Sticker

All we are saying is... chill out, for God's sake!


Available as Bumper Sticker, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk),

Click to read gift-related article
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Make Love Not Wall Bumper Sticker Bumper Sticker

Support a new canal between Brownsville, Texas, and San Diego, California -- Ain't gonna study wall no more!


Available as Bumper Sticker, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk),

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Shell we shop?

Carbon Cap Stonewashed Cap

Don't wait for Congress to impose a carbon cap on you! Start wearing one today.


Available as Cap, Stonewashed Cap,

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Why, what WONDERFUL gift ideas! Simply charming!

Giraffe Yard Sign Yard Sign

Want to go all out for your next house party, but you're a trifle timid? Let our giraffe stick its neck out for you on this funny yard sign to welcome guests.


Available as Modern Wall Clock, Yard Sign,

Click to read gift-related article
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Thinking (vehemently) of you Greeting Card Greeting Card

Inside of card shows friendly German Shepherd, with the words: PSYCH! (Just kidding!)


Available as Greeting Card, Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 20), Note Cards (Pk of 10), Note Cards (Pk of 20),

Click to read gift-related article
Why, what WONDERFUL gift ideas! Simply charming!

Gila Monster Magnet Magnet

This gila monster magnet is a real scream!


Available as Magnet,

Click to read gift-related article




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Yes! You're actually shopping at my online store! Whee-ha!

We Come In Peas Alien Mouse Pad Mousepad

Talk about little green men, these aliens even fly LEED-certified spaceships!


Available as Kids Baseball Jersey, Mousepad, Mug, Note Cards (Pk of 20), Ringer T, Sticker (Rectangle 10 pk), Tile Coaster,

Click to read gift-related article
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Barn Owl Save the Barns Bumper Sticker Bumper Sticker

Raise the eco-consciousness of tailgaters with this attractive SAVE THE BARNS sticker.


Available as Apron, Bib, Bumper Sticker, Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Magnet 10-pack, Mousepad, Mousepad, Mousepad,

Click to read gift-related article
When will that wonderful gift arrive?!!

Owl Always Love You Burrowing Owl Greeting Card Greeting Cards (Pack of 10)

Greet your loved ones with a heartfelt message from Athene cunicularia, the Burrowing Owl (also known, appropriately enough, as "the Howdy Owl")


Available as Apron, Bib, Bumper Sticker, Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Magnet 10-pack, Mousepad, Mousepad, Mousepad,

Click to read gift-related article




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Thanks to your purchase today, Webmaster and author Brian Quass can buy more pet jellyfish for his swimming pool!

Great Horned Owl Greeting Cards Greeting Cards (Pack of 10)

Send a card from the bottom of your heart and the top of the food chain


Available as Apron, Bib, Bumper Sticker, Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Magnet 10-pack, Mousepad, Mousepad, Mousepad,

Click to read gift-related article
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Humorous Chef's Apron Apron

Get an ecumenical chuckle at your next cookout with this chef's apron reading, 'Forgive me, Father, for I have singed"


Available as Apron,

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Green is the color of my true love's environment. Speaking of which, check out the carbon cap that I'm going to buy her for her birthday!

Stop Mountaintop Mining Bumper Sticker

Don't let coal companies make a molehill out of any more mountains. Fight back against the environmentally insane practice of mountaintop mining with this new bumper sticker.


Available as Bumper Sticker, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk),

Click to read gift-related article




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Thanks for shopping, daddy-o! I mean, you cats are wild!

Three-Toed Sloth Framed Panel Print

Sloth may be a sin, but this three-toed sloth makes laziness look heavenly -- and what's more, this picture of Bradypus variegatus just may help the kids get to sleep, too.


Available as Framed Panel Print, Kids Baseball Jersey, Large Wall Clock, Mini Poster Print, Modern Wall Clock, Mousepad, Throw Pillow, Tote Bag, Value T-shirt, Wall Clock,

Click to read gift-related article
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Nothing is more vulgar than haste Bumper Sticker

'Nothing is more vulgar than haste.' Mind you, Emerson wrote that over a century before the first 'shock jock' hit the radio -- yea, even before the first radio had hit the radio (so to speak)


Available as Bumper Sticker, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk),

Click to read gift-related article
Frosty the Snowman here, saying I buy all my corn cob pipes and button noses at the Q-riosity Shop gift shop at Quass.com (yep, that's this very page, folks!)

Let's Go Fry a Kite Mousepad

Mouse-over this innovation-inspiring mouse pad from AFLAPS: Americans for Lightning as Power Source, founded by webmaster to encourage a modernday Tesla to harness lightning for domestic energy use


Available as Keepsake Box, Large Mug, Mousepad, Throw Pillow, Tote Bag, Value T-shirt, Wall Clock,

Click to read gift-related article




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When will that wonderful gift arrive?!!

In Case of Raptor... Sticker (Bumper 50 pk)

If you don't want to graduate Magna Cum Fishbait from Jurassic High, then do not -- I repeat: DO NOT -- try to outrun T-Rex by car. Hide in the nearest enormous ferns and keep very quiet!!!


Available as Bumper Sticker, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk),

Click to read gift-related article
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Sparkler! Sparkler! Large Framed Print

Post this poem and watch the suits in Trenton squirm: 'Sparkler, Sparkler, burning bright, in New Jersey late at night, who's the bureaucratic lout who would try to put you out?'


Available as Framed Panel Print, Large Framed Print, Mini Poster Print, Mousepad, Sigg Water Bottle, Wall Clock,

Click to read gift-related article
God still doesn't play dice -- even if a certain online store at Quass.com is selling a greeting card that shows the Old Fellow doing precisely that!

God Does Not Play Dice Greeting Cards (Pack of 10)

God doesn't play dice (Inside reads: though he has been known to plunk down an occasional tenner on a horse race. Happy Birthday to an odds-on favorite!)


Available as Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 20),

Click to read gift-related article




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When will that wonderful gift arrive?!!

Drill Here, Drill Now Sticker (Rectangle)

Practical jokers: stick this retired political mantra on the object (or person) of your choice and let the laughter begin!


Available as Sticker (Rectangle 10 pk), Sticker (Rectangle 50 pk), Sticker (Rectangle),

Click to read gift-related article
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You've Got Taxes! Mousepad

You can run from the IRS, but you can't hide. Still, you can at least shame them into chilling out a tad by poking gentle but firm fun at them with an economically cathartic mousepad. (Can, too!)


Available as Fitted T-Shirt, Mousepad, Ringer T, Sigg Water Bottle, Sticker (Rectangle 10 pk), Sticker (Rectangle 50 pk), Sticker (Rectangle), Throw Pillow, Tote Bag, Value T-shirt, Wall Clock,

Click to read gift-related article
Ahh! You'll feel so good after supporting Quass.com with a purchase from our gift shop!

I brake for crumhorns Bumper Sticker

Create some buzz about the instrument that musicians love to hate. Buy this 'I brake for crumhorn' bumper sticker and be the envy of every tailgating church organist.


Available as Bumper Sticker,

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Today's homework, class, is to buy at least one super cool gift at Ye Olde Owle Shoppe on Quass.com -- it's for show-and-tell, you understand.

Color Me Human Baseball Jersey

This just in: Everybody in the human race is related. Pass it on -- with the help of this 'color me human' baseball jersey from Quass.com. 'Colorblind batter up!'


Available as Baseball Jersey, Boxer Shorts, Fitted T-Shirt, Framed Tile,

Click to read gift-related article
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Misty of Chincoteague Mousepad

Navigate back to Virginia's favorite island for vacationers with a mouse pad featuring Misty of Chincoteague, the pony made famous in the story of the same name by Marguerite Henry


Available as 2.25 inch Button, Apron, Baseball Jersey, Calendar Print, Framed Panel Print, Framed Tile, Golf Shirt, Hooded Sweatshirt, Journal, Jr. Hoodie, Keepsake Box, Kids Baseball Jersey, Kids Hoodie, Kids Sweatshirt, Large Framed Print, Light T-Shirt, Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Magnet, Men's Sleeveless Tee, Messenger Bag, Mousepad, Ringer T, Throw Pillow, Tile Coaster, Tote Bag, Value T-shirt, Wall Clock, White T-Shirt, Women's Light T-Shirt, Women's Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Zip Hoodie,

Click to read gift-related article
Psst! Wolfgang Kluck highly recommends the Barred Owl Chef's Apron!

Got Fruit? Mousepad

Mouse over this colorful reminder of our honeybee friends and the vital role that they play in pollinating all of our favorite fruits and vegetables! (Thanks again, bees! Keep up the good work!)


Available as Bumper Sticker, Calendar Print, Large Mug, Mousepad, Mug, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper), Sticker (Rectangle 50 pk), Throw Pillow, Wall Clock,

Click to read gift-related article




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When will that wonderful gift arrive?!!

Time for gun collectors to change hobbies 2.25 inch Magnet (10 pack)

Do you have 10 friends with brains? Give them each a button from this magnetic 10-pack so that they can protest the selfishness of gun nuts who value collecting UZIs over saving human lives.


Available as 2.25 inch Button, 2.25 inch Button, 2.25 inch Button (10 pack), 2.25 inch Button (10 pack), 2.25 inch Button (100 pack), 2.25 inch Button (100 pack), 2.25 inch Magnet (10 pack), 2.25 inch Magnet (10 pack), 2.25 inch Magnet (100 pack), 2.25 inch Magnet (100 pack), 3 inch Lapel Sticker (48 pack), 3 inch Lapel Sticker (48 pack), 3.5 inch Button, 3.5 inch Button, 3.5 inch Button (10 pack), 3.5 inch Button (10 pack), 3.5 inch Button (100 pack), 3.5 inch Button (100 pack), Apron, Bumper Sticker, Calendar Print, Calendar Print, Ceramic Travel Mug, Ceramic Travel Mug, Fitted T-Shirt, Framed Panel Print, Framed Tile, Golf Shirt, Green T-Shirt, Hooded Sweatshirt, Jr. Hoodie, Jr. Jersey T-Shirt, Jr. Raglan, Jr. Ringer T-Shirt, Keepsake Box, Kids Baseball Jersey, Kids Hoodie, Kids Sweatshirt, Large Framed Print, Large Framed Print, Large Mug, License Plate Frame, Light T-Shirt, Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Magnet, Maternity T-Shirt, Men's Sleeveless Tee, Messenger Bag, Messenger Bag, Mini Button, Mini Button (10 pack), Mini Button (100 pack), Mini Poster Print, Modern Wall Clock, Modern Wall Clock, Mousepad, Mousepad, Mug, Note Cards (Pk of 10), Note Cards (Pk of 10), Note Cards (Pk of 20), Note Cards (Pk of 20), Organic Kids Tee, Organic Men's Fitted, Organic Men's Tee, Ornament (Round), Postcards (Package of 8), Postcards (Package of 8), Rectangle Magnet, Rectangle Magnet, Rectangle Magnet (10 pack), Rectangle Magnet (10 pack), Rectangle Magnet (100 pack), Rectangle Magnet (100 pack), Ringer T, Small Framed Print, Small Poster, Small Poster, Stein, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper), Sticker (Rectangle 10 pk), Sticker (Rectangle 50 pk), Sticker (Rectangle), Sweatshirt, Throw Pillow, Tile Coaster, Tote Bag, Tote Bag, Value T-shirt, Wall Clock, Women's Light T-Shirt, Women's Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Plus Size Scoop Neck T-S, Women's Plus Size V-Neck T-Shirt, Women's Raglan Hoodie, Women's T-Shirt, Women's Tank Top, Women's Tracksuit, Women's V-Neck T-Shirt, Yard Sign, Yellow T-Shirt, Zip Hoodie,

Click to read gift-related article
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I brake for honeybees Sticker (Rectangle 50 pk)

Stung by your friend's indifference to the plight of honeybees? Make your point with this 50-count pack of pro-bee bumper stickers.


Available as Bumper Sticker, Calendar Print, Large Mug, Mousepad, Mug, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper), Sticker (Rectangle 50 pk), Throw Pillow, Wall Clock,

Click to read gift-related article
The weather got you down? Cheer yourself up by purchasing a cool unique gift from this gift shop!

My Friend went back in time Jr. Ringer T-Shirt

Attention Time Travelers: Buy this souvenir jr. ringer t-shirt for your friends who weren't lucky enough to go with you: 'My friend went back in time and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!'


Available as Fitted T-Shirt, Fitted T-Shirt, Fitted T-Shirt, Infant/Toddler T-Shirt, Jr. Jersey T-Shirt, Jr. Jersey T-Shirt, Jr. Jersey T-Shirt, Jr. Ringer T-Shirt, Jr. Ringer T-Shirt, Jr. Ringer T-Shirt, Kids Light T-Shirt, Light T-Shirt, Light T-Shirt, Light T-Shirt, Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Maternity T-Shirt, Maternity T-Shirt, Maternity T-Shirt, Men's Sleeveless Tee, Men's Sleeveless Tee, Men's Sleeveless Tee, Organic Men's Fitted, Organic Men's Fitted, Organic Men's Fitted, Ringer T, Ringer T, Ringer T, Value T-shirt, Value T-shirt, Value T-shirt, White T-Shirt, White T-Shirt, White T-Shirt, Women's Cap Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Cap Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Cap Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Light T-Shirt, Women's Light T-Shirt, Women's Light T-Shirt, Women's Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Long-Sleeve T-Shirt, Women's Plus Size Scoop Neck T-S, Women's Plus Size Scoop Neck T-S, Women's Plus Size Scoop Neck T-S, Women's Plus Size V-Neck T-Shirt, Women's Plus Size V-Neck T-Shirt, Women's Plus Size V-Neck T-Shirt, Women's T-Shirt, Women's T-Shirt, Women's T-Shirt, Women's V-Neck T-Shirt, Women's V-Neck T-Shirt, Women's V-Neck T-Shirt,

Click to read gift-related article




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Thanks to your purchase today, Webmaster and author Brian Quass can buy more pet jellyfish for his swimming pool!

Free Carukia Barnesi 3.5 inch Button

No justice, no end to this indignant marketing campaign! Buy this 3.5-inch Free Carukia button and tell the world that an innocent Box Jellyfish has been framed down-under by marine biologists.


Available as 2.25 inch Button, 2.25 inch Button (10 pack), 2.25 inch Button (100 pack), 2.25 inch Magnet (10 pack), 2.25 inch Magnet (100 pack), 3 inch Lapel Sticker (48 pack), 3.5 inch Button, 3.5 inch Button (10 pack), 3.5 inch Button (100 pack), Apron, Banner, Baseball Jersey, Bib, Black Cap, Boxer Shorts, Calendar Print, Calendar Print, Cap, Ceramic Travel Mug, Denim Shirt, Fitted T-Shirt, Framed Panel Print, Framed Panel Print, Framed Tile, Framed Tile, Golf Shirt, Green T-Shirt, Greeting Card, Greeting Cards (Pack of 10), Greeting Cards (Pack of 20), Hooded Sweatshirt, Infant Bodysuit, Infant/Toddler T-Shirt, Jr. Hoodie, Keepsake Box, Keepsake Box, Large Mug, Large Pet Bowl , Mousepad, Mousepad, Mug, Note Cards (Pk of 10), Sigg Water Bottle, Small Pet Bowl, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper), Sticker (Bumper), Throw Pillow, Tote Bag, Wall Clock, Women's Raglan Hoodie, Women's Tracksuit,

Click to read gift-related article
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My other car is a chariot of fire Sticker (Bumper 10 pk)

Hey, what are you laughing at? My other car is a chariot of fire, you know? (Humph! What's the matter, you've never seen a 1984 Oldsmobile before. Humph!)


Available as Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper),

Click to read gift-related article
This gifts are just 'plane' fun, man!

My clone drives a BMW Sticker (Bumper)

Don't tell me those bozos are still making fun of your old beater? Wait till they find out that your clone actually drives a BMW! Buy this bumper sticker and silence your automotive critics today!


Available as Sticker (Bumper),

Click to read gift-related article




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Riley Beagle here would like to thank you for shopping at the Q-riosity Shop at Quass.com, isn't that right, boy!

I brake for webmasters Sticker (Bumper 50 pk)

Buy this 50-count pack of pro-webmaster bumper stickers as thank-you gifts for those lovable nerds in your I.T. department. (Aww! Nice nerds, good nerds -- HELPFUL nerds!)


Available as 3.5 inch Button, 3.5 inch Button (10 pack), Calendar Print, Dog T-Shirt, Golf Shirt, Jr. Hoodie, Large Mug, Messenger Bag, Mousepad, Mug, Small Framed Print, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper), Sticker (Bumper), Throw Pillow,

Click to read gift-related article
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ECHO I Love PHP Sticker (Bumper 50 pk)

Take your programming passion on the road with this eye-catching bumper sticker. (Wait till your fellow nerds start tailgating as per normal: They'll be so jealous when they see this baby!)


Available as 3.5 inch Button, 3.5 inch Button (10 pack), Calendar Print, Dog T-Shirt, Golf Shirt, Jr. Hoodie, Large Mug, Messenger Bag, Mousepad, Mug, Small Framed Print, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper), Sticker (Bumper), Throw Pillow,

Click to read gift-related article
May I recommend a birthday or a Christmas gift for madame or monsieur?

I Brake for Impressionists Sticker (Bumper)

Show those tail-gating boors that some drivers have whatcha call taste! Slap this pro-Impressionism sticker on your bumper and let the road ragers eat their strictly plebeian hearts out!


Available as Framed Panel Print, Framed Tile, Large Framed Print, Sticker (Bumper 10 pk), Sticker (Bumper 50 pk), Sticker (Bumper),

Click to read gift-related article




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God still doesn't play dice -- even if a certain online store at Quass.com is selling a greeting card that shows the Old Fellow doing precisely that!

Stab THIS! Large Mug

You never know when you might be having breakfast with a psychopath. But not to worry: This 'Stab This!' mug will make old loony-tunes think twice before penciling you in on their calendar of infamy.


Available as Large Mug, Mousepad, Mug,

Click to read gift-related article
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Surrender THIS! Yorktown, Virginia Sticker (Bumper)

How about a little revolutionarily incorrect humor for your car's bumper? Buy the 'Surrender This!' sticker from Quass.com and watch the once-hapless Lord Cornwallis 'get his own back'!


Available as Sticker (Bumper), Throw Pillow, Tote Bag,

Click to read gift-related article
Having a bad day? Cheer yourself up with the purchase of a unique gift from Ye Olde Owle Shoppe of Dorian Gray!

I speed up for grumps Sticker (Bumper)

Egghead Knievel here, folks. Have you ever had a nice day ruined by the peevish declamations of a grump? Launch a preemptive cathartic strike against spoilsports with this anti-grump bumper sticker


Available as Sticker (Bumper),

Click to read gift-related article




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Shell we shop?

Age Before Botox Sticker (Bumper)

Show those tailgaters where you place YOUR aesthetic priorities while tacitly evincing your philosophical equanimity with the human condition. Memento mori meets bumper sticker.


Available as Sticker (Bumper),

Click to read gift-related article