The surprisingly delightful musings of a humble Virginian whose satiric paeons to a plausible utopia implicitly shame the cynical zeitgeist of our times, causing it to cry, as 'twere, 'Damn, what was I thinking?' or words to that effect.

December 2017

Henry David Thoreau vs Silicon Valley

Clash of the Mindsets

Remember Thoreau? The dude who went to the woods because he wanted to live deliberately? Well, let's hope that Henry doesn't come back to haunt 21st-century America because he would find that his quaint philosophy of life has gone decidedly out of fashion.

Nowadays one only goes to the woods, if at all, to chop them down. It's the age of efficiency after all. A trip to the woods is just so many wasted steps. Besides, I don't know how we'd even get to a place as abstractly referenced as "the woods." If Thoreau wants us to join him in the boonies, spiritually speaking, then let him give us the physical address of these woods of which he speaks. How else are we going to ask Siri for directions?

And as far as Thoreau's plans to (and I quote) "suck out all the marrow of life," that sounds pretty labor-intensive to me. I think I'll just sit at home binge-watching while I wait for the unveiling of an app that will do most of that sucking for me.

Nothing personal, Henry, but the physical world is just SO 20th century!

People who enjoyed this article had nothing but praise for the author's rendition of Auld Lang Syne. In fact, 46 of every 72 who listened to it went on to purchase it, with a full 33 of that latter subset vowing to do their part to "big the song up" by dint of frequent sharing of the same online, a vow communicated to the author by text and e-mails so lavishly ornamented with cheerful and adamant emojis as to amply testify to the sincerity and ardor of the message sender.

Copyright 2017, Brian Quass (follow on Twitter)